It was such a treat to be a part of their ceremony which was short and perfectly sweet and to capture some shots of the new Mr. and Mrs. Montani and their families. Congrats Sarah and Matt!

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Like a whole lot of people all over the world, I continue to be baffled at the fact that this is even a question on the table to debate. Why on Earth are people challenging the right of two consenting adults to love one another and to legally formalize that union, if they so choose?  The fact is, our time in this world is short and lord knows it isn’t always easy.  If you can find someone who makes your days a little bit brighter and makes the bumpy parts of the road a little bit smoother, then I say more power to you…What a small miracle it is to even find such a person! This “question” of rights isn’t even a question, or at least it shouldn’t be because it’s really so simple. Sheryl and Lee and thousands of other same sex couples love each other deeply and deserve the exact same rights that are granted to heterosexual couples, plain and simple.

The cozy and intimate ceremony and celebration were held in Gloucester, coincidentally at the same restaurant where my husband and I had our rehearsal dinner 11 years ago. The decor was perfect and personal and the vibe was joyous. The toasts were the kind that made me feel like I knew everyone in the room and the one given by Sheryl’s dad had me sniveling behind my camera and cursing my decision to wear mascara. The love between everyone in room was palpable and I left the wedding that night with the same slightly sappy feeling that all weddings bring on–the sense that all is right in the world, at least at that moment and in that place. Here are a few of my favorites from the day:

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I mentioned the kind offer to Mike that week and told him of course I’d declined. We might be in the middle of moving and it would be hard to leave the girls and I hadn’t even been on a plane since before Zoe was born and on and on and on I went with all of the reasons why it would just be silly.  Mike being Mike just listened and at some point casually asked me “Do you want to go?”  No, I said….No, that sounds so amazing but really, who goes to Ireland for 3 days? We can’t justify flying all of us over there in the middle of buying a home and it certainly wouldn’t be fair for me to just prance over to Ireland for a weekend  and leave him in the midst of packing up our condo and entertaining 2 kids under 5 solo.  But later that week, when it came up again he just looked at me. “You know, it’s not too often that people are going to come along and offer to fly either of us to another country and cover our expenses. We’d all be totally fine here.”

It’s not that I didn’t know that  they would all be fine but for some reason, I was still coming up with all kinds of reasons why this just didn’t make sense. And then, suddenly it sort of did.   I love traveling and as much as you can reclaim more and more of who you were pre-kids as the kids get older, carefree travel isn’t really one of those things that you can just add back on to your to-do list.  Between the expense and the complexity of scheduling around  the kids’ needs if you bring them or coordinating with someone to keep them for a few days or a week if you don’t bring them, I’m ready to to take a nap just from thinking about it all. So why on earth would I not just hop on a plane in July, fly to Ireland, shoot my friends’ magical wedding and then fly back that Monday? Would I really say no because I’d be really tired and jetlagged?  If I skipped out on this kind of chance because I was nervous about flying for the first time in years and afraid of being tired after the trip, that would be about as lame as it gets.  Every parent has experienced the depths of exhaustion that small children can bring you to and we’ve all survived.  Coffee is an amazing thing and so is having an incredible spouse who I knew would have my back if I was stumbling around in  the wrong time zone for a few days.

The trip was indeed a 72 hour whirlwind adventure from start to finish. As  I stood taking in my surroundings in the castle as they sun was just setting at nearly 10 PM (!) on Saturday during the wedding,  that thing happened where you can practically feel a specific moments being burned in your memory. I will be forever glad that I said yes.  It’s true that I’d been to Ireland once before in my early twenties when I was a college student and spent a semester in England.  I already knew how beautiful of a country Ireland is, how it feels to sip a Guiness in a real Irish pub, and how breathtaking the castles are.  But 16 years later, a husband and 2 kids later, I am now much more qualified to appreciate that while all of that was an incredible backdrop, the real beauty is in two people finding one another and knowing with every part of their being that this is it.  No matter how two people come to that realization, whether the road is bumpy or long or full of detours along the way, once you know that you are where you are supposed to be, nothing else really matters.  Joe and Kate ended up exactly where they belonged and I am so grateful to have been invited along for the beautiful  ride.

“You will always love and you will always be loved”

–Oscar Wilde

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